“8 Years Ago Today”
8 years ago today I took this picture of Heather in her quarantined room at Dana Farber through the wall of a plastic barrier. The image was taken a couple of hours after the bone marrow of a woman named Brandy (whom we did not know anything about at that time) was infused into her body in an attempt to save her life from an advanced staged acute lymphoblastic leukemia. In a way, the day of the infusion was anti-climatic as all that was involved was hooking a bag, of what looked like blood, up to one of Heather’s hickman ports on her chest. The whole thing took about an hour. Yet, the sacrifice (the surgery was painful for Brandy) and generosity of love shown by her and by our friends, family and complete strangers was anything but trivial. From the day of our wedding in Heather’s hospital room with just a few family members as witnesses, the word cancer has changed our lives. In some ways the word and it’s deeds broke and made us harder people, but in other ways it built us up and awoke in us a profound gratitude for all the joys the process of living a life can bring.
For all the pain, fear and anger associated with watching the love of your life hurt so deeply, it has all been worth it to be able to watch the sheets of our bed rise and fall with each breath she takes. At times when I am able to clear away the clutter of the day from my mind and think to turn to my left and catch a glimpse of her breathing softly and assuredly beside me, it’s almost like the act of praying for me. I don’t know why some of us make it through these sorts of things and why some of us don’t. I believe God loves all of us equally so I can’t answer those kinds of questions. As for me all that I know is that there is much to be grateful for.
I’m grateful for the love of a stranger.
I’m grateful for the community of family and friends.
I’m grateful that Heather has been able to experience the joy of living these past 8 years.
I’m grateful that her life slowly makes me a better person.
I’m grateful to know God isn’t angry for me being angry.
I’m grateful that God loves us when we are broken and when we are whole.
9 comments in ““8 Years Ago Today””
August 3rd, 2009 at 20:10
I am grateful for all of those things, too, son. But moreso, I am grateful for you and for my Precious. You both are a clear reflection of the face of our Savior which, I believe, is exactly how God wants you to be.
August 3rd, 2009 at 6:04
I am grateful to hear encouraging words such as these…a wonderful lady, who has a photostream here on flickr, just learned her son is diagnosed with leukemia…here is a photo of her son and his wife…
I so hope she can read this soon…I will send her the link to this photo…her photostream is very nice and is mostly photos of the west. The name of her photostream is Outdoor Exposure by Denise…and if you click on the photo of her son and his wife, you will be linked to her photostream immediately.
What a precious couple you two are…may you have many, many more years together.
August 4th, 2009 at 7:44
Thanks again, Andrew.
August 4th, 2009 at 0:36
Hey Denise, I looked at your photostream tonight after reading April’s post. I sorry that you, your son and the rest of your family is going through all of this. Heather has been through it all too—chemo, radiation, bone marrow transplant, all kinds of meds, etc. so if you ever want to talk about any of it please feel free to contact us.
August 3rd, 2009 at 9:35
Thank you Andrew & April….. I really needed this right now!
August 5th, 2009 at 13:53
From my own experience, I know that prayer is powerful, and to share this with others is my privilege and God’s gift.
August 17th, 2009 at 11:08
What a sad, but truthful photo. I’m lost for words at what life can give you. I’m blessed though that Heather is a fighter and survived such a vicious battle. Here’s to another many years!!
August 26th, 2009 at 15:23
i remember those days hours of unwavering prayers.praise God, bless God,for the love that you both share with each other and with God.i wonder what it feels like to be loved by another human being as your love for each other.
August 21st, 2010 at 16:09
Andrew and Heather,
I love you two! Your story I just told to a friend last weekend. You mean the world to me, your joyful love of one another, balanced perspectives, and wisdom and encouragement that God lets flow through you. In the words of a friend at our church who has suffered terribly, “We need to remember that everything we are allowed to experience comes filtered through the hands of a loving God.” I love how God has blessed you with life, Heather!
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